My own personal hell

[nomrbddgs]

You cannot keep blaming yourself for this attack. You did the best you could at the time. Now you know why most of us are so, so careful. Especially with bitches. I am so sorry for all that you have been through. As Pat always says, it works until it doesn't. I can't tell you how sorry I am for you. I don't have enough words for your losses. On both counts.

[agilebasenji]

I hope you are beginning to forgive yourself. Please stop blaming yourself. Of course you would have done something different if you'd have known, but we can't very well see around the corners of the the future. Your love for Aries (and even Katie) come through in your post.
Peace.

[MacPack]

Your post is one of the saddest I have ever read, I am so sorry for your pain and all you have lost. We all want it to work, when there are issues between our dogs, and usually it does. Don't blame yourself for trying to keep both your beloved dogs. As the saying goes, "hindsight is 20-20". Please know that we feel your pain and do not fault you for anything you did. Life is all about trial and error. Of course you would have done it differently , if you could have seen the future but no one can. Please forgive yourself, and when you are able, give another basenji a loving, wonderful home. Big warm hugs to you, you have indeed been through hell.

[Kipawa]

This is beyond sad, and my heart is heavy for you. But perhaps now that you have shared the story with us, you can start to re-heal and forgive yourself. Bless you. That is more than anyone should go through.

[stash]

I,m so sorry for your heartache and wish you all the best and hope you find peace and let another dog into your loving heart.

[thunderbird8588]

I am so very sorry to hear of you loss of Aries and Katie.

[DebraDownSouth]

Someone said you cannot keep blaming yourself. But you can. And will. You made a call, or avoided making one, that ended in horrible consequences. No one else had the power to make the call. Who else will you blame?

But I hope one day you can look at your decisions and realize that decisions made out of love, even if they go bad, are the ones we must understand, accept that your heart was trying to do the best and that in the long run, you suffered more than either dog. They had love and they had a human doing all possible. And they are not suffering.

We can destroy our lives with the should haves. Or we can take what we learned and move forward. If your story helps even one person, you have honored both dogs. There are no words to help you overcome the pain, but I hope you find it within to simply accept that you made decisions out of love and move on.

[eeeefarm]

Very wise words. Thank you Debra. We all learn from our mistakes, and we should learn from the mistakes of others. It is impossible not to dwell on what might have been, and what should have been done differently. I think most of us have been there at one time or another. My sympathies, and I hope time brings you the healing you need.

[curlytails]

I think it was incredibly brave for you to be as truthful as you were here. This was difficult to read, but perhaps your sharing it today means that someone will learn from your tragedy. Your dogs were loved, and they will continue to be, no matter the shadows that mark their passing. They are now at peace. I hope that you will find yours with time.

[Patty M]

My sincere condolences to you… nothing can change the past, but we must learn from it. Thank you for sharing your story.
Hugs and roos.

[Moth]

My condolences on the loss of your dogs…

You can beat yourself up with right and wrong, could have and should have...but things are what they are. You loved your dogs and tried to do the best by them. Tragedy happened and it hurts...time to try and heal now.

[Patty]

I've already made my comments on the BBR Forum . Hugs to you.

[nkjvcjs]

Thank you so much to everyone who has replied. We loved Aries so much, and miss her so much, but I think talking about it helps.

[tanza]

@nkjvcjs:

Thank you so much to everyone who has replied. We loved Aries so much, and miss her so much, but I think talking about it helps.

Been there, done that….. we can only do what we can... and each dog is different. The decisions we make, we make as best we can. You did what you thought was best at the time. No use is "what if"... or that is all we would do for our life time. In the same situation, I think I would have done the same. HUGS

[ownedbyspencer]

Oh, I'm so sorry! How heartbreaking. Some things are just hard and while time can't erase, I hope it can heal. Hugs to you!