And when you want a dog and you don't know about the importance of choosing the right dog from the right breeder, things like waiting lists seem snobby, exclusive and preposterous. Why would you wait years for a dog from breeder A when breeder B will send you home with one today?
I think you're right about this, and it's something that folks who emphasize the need to get good dogs from good breeders don't often talk about. But it also ties into a whole larger social phenomenon, too… people just DON'T wait for things anymore. Completely random example/pet peeve: I've been chided for not responding to (non-urgent, to my mind) e-mail within 24 hours. I don't think any of the students I teach know what it's like to, say, request a catalog for something... wait 2-3 weeks for it to arrive... Decide on what you want to purchase... go to the post office... stop by a gas station on the way to get a money order... carefully wrap it up and address an envelope and mail something out... wait 6-8 weeks for the order to arrive. And WOW was it ever a happy mail day when that item finally appeared.
But it's not easy to convince people of the merits and emotional rewards of something as abstract as waiting. And it sounds so downright parental when you try to explain that good things come to those who wait, who take care and pride in their decisions.
To me, the bottom line is the ethics of it all. Realizing what you do affects the bigger picture. And that takes some explaining, and yes, the conversation can frequently veer into the pretentious/judgmental, and the frustrating, especially when your audience just doesn't care to listen.