They just passed one of the strongest animal cruelty bills in the nation here in Utah. I just scanned through really quick and found this: "A person is guilty of cruelty to animals if the person intentionally, knowingly, recklessly, or with criminal negligence: […] transports or confines an animal in a cruel manner". I'm thinking that with the way that puppy mills treat the mothers would certainly qualify. Hopefully with the whole Michael Vick thing more states will get on the bandwagon and pass laws like Utah has! Make sure your state reps know how you feel about it!
Pet Rules
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To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.
Dear Dogs and Cats, The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate of food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years–canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!
To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:
To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.(That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3. Are easier to train
4. Usually come when called.
5. Never drive your car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't worry about having to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't wear your clothes
10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college,
AND
11.
If they get pregnant, you can sell their children -
That is just excellent
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Too Funny!! I love those. While raising our 3 kids I cannot tell you how many times I muttered to my husband "We should have raised dogs!!"
Pat
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This is going right on my fridge!!! Too Cute!! LOL
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LMAO! I love the last one "if they get pregnant, we can sell their babies" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh my goodness my side hurts from laughing!
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Way too funny
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Hysterical!!!!!!!!!!!! :d :d :d
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A most excellent post!
