Agree with @elbrant and I'd like to add, when you return be very matter of fact, do not make a big fuss, particularly if she is excited and effusive in her greeting to you. Sure, acknowledge her if you must but don't make any sort of big deal out of it. Go about your business, e.g. if you've been shopping, put your things away before spending any time with her. Your goal is to make your absence just part of a normal routine, nothing to be excited about. I've had two separation anxiety dogs, and you know you have won the battle when the dog just glances at you in an "oh, you're back" way and doesn't bother getting off the couch! Yes, people like it when their dog greets them and makes a big fuss, but if you feed that behaviour you give too much emphasis to your absence and that can grow into anxiety in your dog.
I need some help
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My motherin law, just got a new Chi whos owner died,and i dont know what 2 do my Stella hates him her hair stands up she snaps and growls but so does the chi. the Chi also goes after my Vizsla but is ok w/ other Chi and cats. Im just getting Stella to not chase the cats and hurt them . I WILL NOT get rid of stella like my mother wants its my house and she was here !st. What should i do?:(
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My motherin law, just got a new Chi whos owner died,and i dont know what 2 do my Stella hates him her hair stands up she snaps and growls but so does the chi. the Chi also goes after my Vizsla but is ok w/ other Chi and cats. Im just getting Stella to not chase the cats and hurt them . I WILL NOT get rid of stella like my mother wants its my house and she was here !st. What should i do?:(
Okay, this is YOUR house, and Stella is YOUR dog.
No question. The Chi goes.
I think she's got a lot of nerve asking YOUR dog to go.Or maybe I'm just like Jazzy…... a b*tch!!
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I agree with JazzysMom!!! How dare she?!? Although you don't necessarily have to be incensed with her about. You can just stand your ground.
And besides, maybe in time, things will calm down with some training. But your mother-in-law should help with that by controlling her animals.
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My boyfriends mom has two tiny little dogs about chi size lol ones yhat's nicer than nice and one that is unbelievably mean. When we took rocky over there Christmas eve she made us hold him and not let him near them. I know that if she brought her dogs into my house I would tell her they need to go.. BC my dogs would not be punished in their own house for not doing anything wrong. I completely agree with jazzysmom. That chi needs to go. Its your house not hers and what makes her think she makes the big decisions? You have the final say. If give it a few days or a week or two to see if things settle down. Maybe keep them separate with baby gates?
Jazzysmom… Youre just telling it how it is
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i would be pretty b**** about that myself i would give her 2 options 1 is she gets rid of the dog she was trying to do the nice thing but unfortunately it's not working out or # 2 she can keep the dog and find somewhere else to live . i can't believe she would have even said something like that to u my sister is staying with me for a little while and had to place her dog in another home cuz mine do not get along with hers but she wouldnt even think of asking me can u get rid of one of urs so i can keep mine thats just crazy …
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I will add, that in my experience with my dogs, my girl in particular, I couldn't have a dog that size in my house. My Rosie has a stronger prey drive than Willie (Willie would probably just want to play, a little roughly) but Rose is another story! When they run together, I can't let them be around tiny dogs. They start to become a pack of two and go into hunting mode.
But I still feel that the last dog in, if it doesn't work, unfortunately needs to be re-homed. It's just really sticky because it's your mother in-law. but that doesn't change what's right. She shouldn't even ask. You hold onto your Stella.
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Kick your mother in law and her dog out!
How dare she.
Take your mother in law to a Walmart far away then say you need to go to the rest room, then leave!
The Mother In Law needs to go ASAP with her dog.
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It is a sticky situation because lord knows that family drama is the worst & the last thing you want to do is cause family issues. However, I agree with everyone that it is unfair that she asked you to get rid of your dog after she was there long before the chi & it's YOUR home so ultimately YOUR decision.
Although I would honestly give it a bit more time for readjusting. Have you guys looked into getting a trainer to come in & offer suggestions? Maybe try taking them for walks [Stella, your vizsla & the chi] so they maybe become more comfortable together on neutral territory. Good luck!
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It is unfair of you Mother-in-law to ask you to get rid of your dog when she is staying in your house imposing on you and brought in another without any thought about how it would impact you and your household. Unfortunately, if she is the type of person who would even tell you such a thing, she is also probably the type of person who isn't going to be very receptive to the type of solutions this problem will need. Since there is such a size difference between the Chi and your dogs, you will probably be best keeping your mother in laws dogs separate from your dogs and ask your mother in law to at minimum split the costs to consult an animal behaviorist if not pay for the consultation herself since she is the one who has caused the need for it.
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The Chi has to go. My dad used to say…you live under my roof, you live by my rules..it applied when he stayed at my house too. Your MIL has no right to ask you to get rid of Stella. I can't believe she would ask that of you while she is living in your home...that's just not right. Is her living with you a permanent situation now? If not, can the Chi be kept in one room away from the other dogs until she leaves?
I have some experience with a Chi, my basenji's and vizsla. My neighbor got one and wants all our dogs to be friends...that's not happening as the B's want to eat it and have from the start. He lets it run loose and it came into our yard once and if I wasn't right on top of the dogs taking it out of their mouths it would be dead now. At first, I thought they had squirrel, then it registered that it was the Chi. My Vizsla will play with him but once pawed him and the thing went flying about 10 feet.
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This is the mother-in-law, right? What does your spouse say about the situation?
I gotta tell ya, there's no way in hell my dh would let his mother move in with her dogs. No way. And if she already lived here, she'd never get a new dog in the front door.
It does seem a little nervy. I mean, if I were living in someone else's house, I wouldn't even think to bring in a pet. Well, maybe a fish bowl, but that'd be it.
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Okay, your house, your rules. Stella stays. Okay, that leaves 3 things you can do:
1. chi goes
2. dogs are kept separated
3. you try to get the dogs to get along with each otherHow long has the chi been in the house? How were the chi and Stella introduced? Ages and spay status? Why does MIL think it's okay to bring a new dog into your house? Are there any pet restrictions in you HOA or city? (Many times it is 3 and if you have a basenji, a vizsla and a cat, that could be the limit and you have a built in bad guy.) What's DH say?
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I feel bad for her cause her 1st chi Ren is getting real old and she wanted another chi Stella loves ren and the other dogs but between my mom in laws cats 5 of them and the new chi im going crazy i have the house split but im not a fan of walking over gates lol in the middle of the night going over a gate at the top of the stairs is not fun. I gave in a little when she wanted to get him cause on dec 30 we found her son dead and earlyer in the year my dad passed but 5 dogs 5 cats plus other animals im going crazy thank you for letting me vent i just need to know how to get the chi and stella together im mean she playes w/ my squirreul all the time < how ever you spell it > so i know she can be nice . on the other hand i cant take her to the dog park she picks fights all the time
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Stella and the chi meet outside in a friends yard chi been here 4 days he is fixed she is getting fixed in a few weeks just found a vet who deals w/ Bs
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Dh says get rid of all dogs start over just keep the Vizsla lol my hubby is from hungery
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thank you for letting me vent i just need to know how to get the chi and stella together im mean she playes w/ my squirreul all the time < how ever you spell it > so i know she can be nice . on the other hand i cant take her to the dog park she picks fights all the time
Did I read that right? You have a basenji that plays nice with a squirrel? Really?
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yep she is real good w/ Nikki im going to take some pics and video of it soon as my mom gets me a dig cam 4 my bday comming up soon
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Dh says get rid of all dogs start over just keep the Vizsla lol my hubby is from hungery
Dh is probably totally overwhelmed! FIVE dogs, FIVE cats, his mom all living there. {I gotta tell you, I was stunned that she would for one moment think to bring a dog into your home, but I nearly fell over when I read she has FIVE FLIPPIN' CATS to boot!} You have taken on an awful lot because you feel bad for her.
No amount of sympathy and no amount of being a doormat for her is going to bring back her son. It's just going to turn your home into a zoo, and your life into a nightmare.I think all the animals should go except the viszla –cuz they are cool -- and the Basenji -- cuz, well, duh :p --. At the very, very least,IMO, HER animals need to go. I HATE giving up animals, but at some point sanity needs to reign. Nobody sounds happy with the current living arrangement, and sometimes as life takes it's twists and turns tough decisions have to be made.
Man, good luck with this one.
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Some dogs will not get along with each other no matter what you do. There are things you can try but you also need to be ready to accept that they may never like each other.
It sounds like your house is very full and that may be contributing to the strain between Stella and the new Chi. I know if my house was that crowded and someone else moved in, I would be pretty darn grumpy too.
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well today iam looking for a new home for all the cats. I just feel realy realy bad and dh is so happy he hates cats and now maybe i can make it look like the new chi ran away cause i know some one who will take him i just dont know how to do it
