He should adjust in time to losing his companion. However long that takes is questionable though and he will continue to be angry and feel neglected and reflect that anger with destruction just out of loneliness. It may improve with time and may not. You have to ask yourself is this fair for your dog? I would spend nearly all my time with him when I was home taking walks, etc. and if you can't do more than 2 hrs. it may be best to find a better home for him where he has a better environment. If his new home is a better place where there is a yard to run, and owners that can spend more time with him he will gradually accept the new home and owners. I know that is hard but may be the best. When your living situation improves you may think about owning another dog.
Other than that, working 2 jobs leaves the dog alone too much to be fair so you need to get someone…the same person all the time... over to your apartment to spend time with him if you don't want to give him up. He can bond to that person and that will help the loneliness somewhat. If you decided to give him up, the new owners could come over frequently for walks and visits before you gave the dog to them so that the dog would consider them friends before adoption, that would help the dog transition. I would not give that dog to an inexperienced owner though. That could end in disaster. It will do the same things with the new owner although it should get over the transition quicker because it will be in a better environment. Also, was your husband the dog's leader? You now have to be a positive leader for him because it sounds like he lacks leadership.
Help….What do I do...
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I agree Andrea, all good points
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I too agree with Andrea and Pat.
Does she wear her collar indoors? - I would put a short length of cord on it and use it gently to get her to move. She shouldn't be allowed to get away with being able to do as she wants just because she growls or even bites. But NEVER use any form of punishment. Patience and firm gentleness is the essential in my opinion. I'd be interested to know what response you get from her breeder.
In early days in the UK many Basenjis were known as aggressive but they weren't, it was just that their owners really had no idea about a Basenji's psyche.
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Thanks everyone for the input! I have talked to the breeder and they said that the mother has growled in the past , but has not bitten. The father has no signs of aggresion. She has been to the vet a lot of times. I feel very comfortable in saying that she acts this way when we are asking her to do something she does not want to do. One of the problems is that she sleeps with us and she had got where she wanted to sleep right on me. So I put her bed at the foot of our bed. She is fine starting out there but on in to the night she wants to get next to me. I am wandering if she is cold. We cover her up in her bed. I had thought about letting her wear a sweater to sleep in. I will check into finding someone to help me with this. It is really hard to find people who are familiar with basenjis here. I live in Grapevine, Texas. This is in the Dallas Ft. Worth area. THANKS AGAIN!!!
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I might add that a friend of mine has her sister and she has had no issues what so ever with aggression. I am a little concerned that I have spoilt her. I am with her all day long and do a lot with her. I pet and baby her a lot. My friend does not have the time to do this. I have no children at home and my husband is gone a lot so it is me and her. I have never had this breed before and everyone always says they are different. I have never had a dog that would bite me or that I was scared of. So this is very different. Like I said earlier though…she has been a great dog. House trained, very calm, not destructive, loves everyone and all animals. This has been our only hurdle so far.
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I just wanted to add that now that I think about it more, we can pick up Ella on quite a few occasions, but the common thread when she shows some aggression is trying getting her to do something she doesn't want to do.
I have to say again from reading this forum for a couple of years, much of this behavior seems pretty typical. That doesn't mean don't try to change it. I just mean, you are not alone and I am sure you will work it. Basenjis sleep deeply. Many do not like to be woken up. I use a treat each morning to wake Ella up to get her out the door for the morning walk–she has to shake both paws on command to get it. Basenjis do not respond well to punishment. And Basenjis like to sleep under the covers with their owners! I agree it is both endearing and a hassle. But itis very common. One of the most entertaining threads on this site is the one called Where Does Your Basenji Sleep. Look it up.
I agree that sleeping with a Basenji that is a bed hog and then grumpy/aggressive about it, is a situation that has to be worked out.
It sounds like she is basically a sweet dog. -
I'm concerned that you said you are scared of her. You really need to find some local help and get some one-on-one consultation. I'd bet it won't take long to get your relationship with your pup on track. Afterwards, I'd encourage you to try to find a good postive trainer and take a class. I think it would do wonders for your relationship with your dog. Seems like Family dog or Relationship classes are becoming popular and that's the sort of class I'd suggest. Once you start clicker training it can be a LOT of fun to see what you can train your basenji to do. And the dog will LOVE training time.
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Oh, and if you're worried about her being cold sleeping by herself, google "snuggle safe". I have several and have used them for years.
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I might add that a friend of mine has her sister and she has had no issues what so ever with aggression. I am a little concerned that I have spoilt her. I am with her all day long and do a lot with her. I pet and baby her a lot. My friend does not have the time to do this. I have no children at home and my husband is gone a lot so it is me and her. I have never had this breed before and everyone always says they are different. I have never had a dog that would bite me or that I was scared of. So this is very different. Like I said earlier though…she has been a great dog. House trained, very calm, not destructive, loves everyone and all animals. This has been our only hurdle so far.
And this hurdle will only get worse if you don't stop it now… and yes if you pet and baby her all the time, you have opened the door for her to think she needs to take control and has.... This is really no different then any other breed when they feel they need to take control and be the "alpha" .... you need professional help to help you to understand how to take back the control and NOT by force. And I would only add, that if you are afraid of her, she KNOWS it... and will use that to her advantage
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I normally think a basenji's place is in the bed. But not with dominance issues. It may be time for some gentle 'nothing in life is free" training which includes not sleeping in bed, not being fed without sitting and doing commands, no allowing her to demand attention– she gets it when you are ready.
Deb is a friend of mine, has a pretty basic NILIF description for attention:
http://k9deb.com/nilif.htmThis is an old one, before the word "alpha" got to be so negative. Please notice she uses the term alpha but does not advocate EVER using physical force. I know Vicki did another version but can't find it. However, it's a good read. In so many ways chows and basenji are similar… they think independently and they like to be in control and they respond horribly to physical punishment (as do all dogs but these breeds it is path to destruction!) and force.
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I agree with Debra…dogs who feel it is okay to growl and snap at their owners to get their way should not be sleeping in the bed. Paulajean, you can work this out...just get some good advice from a good trainer...she is not a bad dog, you just need a way to communicate to her that you are the leader Check out Patricia McConnell's book "How to Be the Leader of the Pack (and have your dog love you for it)" you can google it and find it at several different vendors.