We certainly had the same problem with Ella. She had a noticeable preference for women from the first day we got her. I am male and I did most of the walking and the feeding, including hand-feeding her for many weeks (which I highly recommend). We almost re-homed Ella because it was kind of tearing me up and making it diffucult for me to create a close bond with her. Every time I would stand up or make any sudden move she would react, even if she was across the room. I could barely get her to take treats from me. I was walking on egg shells for months.
It has been 2 years and Ella still has a definite preference for women. However, I can say that our bond is extremely close and, if anything, I tend to be the person she obeys the most and that she looks to when she is confused or scared. Our first Basenji friend said she had the same problem with their second Basenji being afraid of the husband. It took a while to overcome.
In our case it took nearly 6 months before I felt accepted by her. In retrospect, it was mostly painful because I didn't know if it would ever work itself out. All I can say is that Basenji's are smart and eventually Rusty will figure out that your husband can be trusted. And once you have a Basenji's trust, you will have it for life.
