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Hi from IL…Need some advice

Behavioral Issues
  • T

    Hi, I am looking for some advice on situation below. I am unsure and worried about any negative impact this may have on my beloved Chet and Bebe: I have a boy (chet) who just turned 16 on Christmas eve and a girl (bebe) who turned 15 last Halloween. I moved from CA to IL one year ago and have been home with the pups for that entire year. Prior to my move, my ex wife and I shared custody of the pups for 4 years once we were divorced (my ex and I get along great so there was never any stress at home, even after we separated…our shared custody was trading off each week and we lived pretty close to each other this was all in the SF bay area). Prior to our separation, my wife worked from home, so the pups are used to having someone around most of the time. Over the last few years, we both worked regular jobs, so have had a full time dog sitter stay with the pups during the day. For the most part, they have not been left alone in the house for more than two hour at the most. My ex said good bye to them almost exactly a year ago and still lives in CA. Since I have been in IL, I have been in care-giver mode and worked from the house 95% of the last year. When I have left for work travel, my folks or a good dog sitter stayed with them, again, never leaving them alone for more than a hour or so at any given time. Just a little more info...both pups are in great health for their age. Chet has definitely slowed down but Bebe acts like she is still around 8 years old. Fast, bolts up the stairs and still has some puppy in her. Just in the last few weeks have I noticed a little slowing down and coordination issues. But nothing significant. All that being said, here is my question that I would really appreciate any support. I need to go on a two week trip and was thinking of having my ex come to my house and watch them while I am gone. Since they have not seen her in over a year and might not see her again after she leaves, I am wondering if this would cause a great deal of stress or confusion if she re-enters their lives for two weeks. She would stay at my house so the surroundings would be consistent and I think they would love to see her, but not sure how much it would impact them once she leaves again. Also, since they are at an advanced age (we are so blessed that they have been with us so long as it is), my guess is that it would be the last time they would see their mom. I am going to continue to work from home and be with them full time until the inevitable arrives. My biggest concern is that I have no idea whether seeing their mom for two weeks is a good or bad idea. I am really torn over this and would love any advice, input or experience that anyone may have had in a similar situation. I truly appreciate any comments!!! TT

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    Agree with Debra: apart from any medical issues, it looks like he is protecting the new life. Cute as it may be, it's not his job. Your husband should step up to the plate and take first position in a clear way. All the best!
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    @dmcarty: Since they are so young I would assume it is each trying to figure out where they fit in the scheme of things and you may be overreacting. I will however tell you that the one breed of dogs that my basenjis have never liked is ****zu. LOL ….. you know it is all about the hair!
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    Needs a home

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    DebraDownSouthD
    LOL Arlene, some spammer hit it, I opened it and didn't notice the dates. Okay so any idea what happened?
  • sabaS

    Confidence Needed…

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    RivermoonR
    I did all the right things with Apache when I got him too…took him to outside malls, parks, the beach..had people of all shapes and sizes meet him and was going to handling class after handling class. Everything was going fine. The fourth show we were ever in we got excused from the ring because he became a bucking bronco on the table every time the judge came toward us. The judge tried 3 different times. I was so frazzled by his actions and couldn't get him under control, so we got excused. Later that day he stood fine on the table for some of the breeders. I have no idea what set him off, if it was the judge or the fact that I had had him to the vets the week before the show and they took a skin scrape while he was on the table. To be on the safe side, I never put him on the table at the vet's again...they had to examine him on the floor. Luckily they were more then willing to do that. I wasn't going to take any chances putting him back in the ring anytime soon, especially since I was so nervous. At handling classes and at home we did what you're doing. He would go up on the table and be fed treats. I would put him on the table at home and just treat him for being up there. We gradually had people in class and at home start going over him all the while treating him. On top of all that, I also had/have a problem with noise sensitivity. Some boys threw a huge firecracker right next to the dogs at handling class one day and since then Apache startles at sudden noises. Almost three months passed before I entered him in another show. This one was inside too, something we had never done. I held him out the first day because the noise really had him jumpy, so we just sat there all day getting him used to it. The second day I decided we were going in. I was the only class dog entered, so there would be no points..but that was fine...I needed to see if he would stand still for the judge. I was more nervous then I'd ever been and it will be a show I always remember for the simple fact that he was REALLY good on the table. Every once in a while he would still get a little fussy, either getting up onto or while on the table.....but would settle down quickly and let the judges go over him. Anyways, it took a while, but I finished him.:D So, hang in there!
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    This B needs an attitude adjustment!

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    BarklessdogB
    The other kind of guarding - for things that he gets by accident - that still continues, but less and less, although I don't trust him fully. He has been trained to go in his crate very willingly because he always gets a treat when he does. If he has something I don't want him to have I tell him to "get in your crate!" which almost always works the first time. He gets his treat, I close the crate, and then I clean up the mess without any worry. For our dog, if it's something like a cookie or pizza, nothing will stop him from devoring it.